6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize