is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
this beer tastes like vomit already
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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