dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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