Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
You did what with his pubic hair?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
