I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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