i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
