in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
