I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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