well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize