If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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