just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
