My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Drunk is not a location!
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Randomize
