I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
