They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
