is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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