Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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