i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
