I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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