Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
