Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Randomize