Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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