He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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