Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
