It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
