I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
