he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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