He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize
