He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Damn victory sex feels great
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Randomize
