I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
