We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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