Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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