Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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