Cold hands, warm shart.
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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