i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
