Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
