just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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