you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
