Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
