Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
one two three fourrrrnication!
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
