ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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