DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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