I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
