singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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