He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
We had sex on a dog bed..
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
