Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
