Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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