We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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