what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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