your room smells of hookers.
And success
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
