just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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