theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
