I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
well you can't waste a boner
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
